- Golfer: Think I’m going to drown myself in the lake.
Caddy: Think you can keep your head down that long? - Golfer: I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddy: Try heaven, you’ve already moved most of the earth. - Golfer: Do you think my game is improving?
Caddy: “Yes sir, you miss the ball much closer now. - Golfer: Do you think I can get there with a 5 iron?
Caddy: Eventually. - Golfer: You’ve got to be the worst caddy in the world.
Caddy: I don’t think so sir. That would be too much of a coincidence. - Golfer: Please stop checking your watch all the time. It’s too much of a distraction.
Caddy: It’s not a watch – it’s a compass. - Golfer: How do you like my game?
Caddy: Very good sir, but personally, I prefer golf. - Golfer: Do you think it’s a sin to play on Sunday?
Caddy: The way you play, sir, it’s a sin on any day. - Golfer: This is the worst course I’ve ever played on.
Caddy: This isn’t the golf course. We left that an hour ago. - Golfer: That can’t be my ball, it’s too old.
Caddy: It’s been a long time since we teed off, sir.